You only Live Once
Indians by and
large do not like their children “falling in love.” That should
apparently happen only after the marriage is consummated! If they do find a
partner, a hundred reasons are brought out for the unsuitability of the boy or
girl.
Sally was a true
blue Jacobite, a Christian sect only slightly different from the Catholics. She
fell in love with a Catholic sailor an officer in the merchant navy.
“You cannot marry
him Sally” announced father, “what will the neighbours say?”
Mother was more
pragmatic, “It does not really matter what the neighbours say. She is our only
daughter and let her be happy.”
Father was even
more angry. “You are a stupid woman. How can she be happy other than with a
Jacobite?”
Mother was not
going to let that pass. “What makes you think I stayed with you all these years
other than for the sake of the children?”
Father glared at
her. In his view, women should silently stay in the kitchen and cook. It was
bad enough that he allowed his daughter to work after her master’s in
microbiology. That was where she had met the wretched sailor.
“We are searching
for an alliance for you.”
“No” announced
Sally.
He got up to
wallop some sense into her. She sped out the back door. Years of drinking,
diabetes and obesity had taken their toll. By the time he got out of his chair
she had disappeared down the road.
They arranged a
marriage for Sally. With emotional blackmail, [“I will die if you marry a
catholic! I will commit suicide) they managed to persuade her to agree to an
arranged marriage.
She was dimpled
and attractive, he was tall lean and mean looking. Within 6 months of marriage
their troubles started. Some one told his mother all about her affair. The lady
took great pleasure in taunting her son. “You married a floozy. She still goes
to the internet café when you are not here and speaks to him”.
One with his
mother was usually shortly followed by a
session with his wife. He beat her , she hit him back. Not satisfied he tried to choke her . She was afraid for
her life.
She spoke to her
parents. “It can’t be that bad,” said her father, it must be just a few slaps.”
“Why should I be
slapped?”
In the face of
Sally’s belligerent attitude, father and mother went to reach a “compromise.”
The son-in law and
his mother screamed and shouted loud enough for the entire neighbourhood to
hear. “Your daughter is a prostitute. Out of charity we have not thrown her on
the street. She can come back here if she apologizes and says she will have no
contact with you again.”
Even father balked
at that.
“What about the flat that is in her name still and
the Rs 500000 that I deposited in her bank account?”
“Peanuts for my
son. Oh yes , I want the flat also transferred to his name.”
Sally refused to
enter the house. “I will not apologize, you want your son to kill me.”
A curious crowd was
gathering, so father quickly bundled them into his car and drove home.
“We will try again
tomorrow. Let us take the priest with us.”
Sally could not
take it any more. That night when “all was still” she crept into her parent’s
room and searched in her father’s wallet. There was Rs 3000 in it. She deftly
removed it.
She silently went
out the door at 5 am. There was a bus
leaving for Bangalore. She bought a ticket and got in.
Father was so
upset the previous day that he had downed a great deal of whisky. By the time
he awoke from his stupor it was 9 o’clock.” “Coffee he bellowed, “I have a head
ache.”
The house was
silent. He went down to the kitchen. His wife was there. “Where is Sally? I
want my coffee.”
“I heard you . I
can’t find Sally and my legs hurt.”
It took them half
a day to realize the money and Sally were missing. Mother wanted to call her
brother. “Let me call him, he will know what to do. Or else let us call her
husband.”
“No “ thundered
father “think of the disgrace.”
“Disgrace? She may
be in danger.”
He snatched
her mobile out of her hand.
Sally finally
reached Bangalore, exhausted and dirty with
an overnight bag. She took an auto rickshaw to her brother’s house. He looked at her in shock.
“What are you
doing here?”
Sally said,”I
left home. I am going to my boss
tomorrow to ask for my job back. I am going to stay in a hostel. I just need
you to put up with me for a few days till I settle these matters.
Brother looked at
her with a great deal of respect. If only she had shown this grit the first
time around!
Sally got job with her old boss. Her expertise in
industrial microbiology was a are commodity and they had not really found a
replacement.
A couple of years
down the line, she had managed to put down the down payment on a car and an apartment
. She did not bother with divorcing her husband. The boyfriend? He was still
not married. When his ship docked in India he came by for a few weeks. She was
not about to take any earth-shaking decisions in her life right now. She was in
touch with her mother, her father refused to speak to her and her brother
supported her. After all, she reasoned, unlike James Bond, you actually “Only Live Once.”
Dr. Gita Mathai
The
writer is a paediatrician with a family practice at Vellore.
If you
have any questions on health issues please write to
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